All children regardless of race, religion, or gender, have a right to be heard, a chance to tell their side of the story, even if there doesn’t seem to be a point. Refusing to validate a child’s voice, no, refusing to hear that voice, is just as bad as bad if not worse than any punishment you could ever inflict on them.
It takes away the power of the child. Not asking for someone else’s side of the story and just assuming they are guilty isn’t something that you just forget. It will stick with a child for the rest of their life.
Every time they look back on their school they will remember that day you didn’t listen to them. They will remember that time you didn’t even ask for their testimony. They will remember that time when you punished them without knowing their side of the story.
In your own ignorance, you gaslighting and victimizing them, leaving them to feel powerless, hopeless, and crazy. When you don’t ask a child for their side of the story.
You are essentially saying that their side, their voice, their rights and opinions don’t matter.
It doesn’t matter if they have something to say because you say they are guilty even if they really aren’t. It’s not just the false accusations that harm a child, but also what the jury and judge (teacher) says and how they respond to those accusations.
It is already emotionally and psychologically traumatizing to a child to be falsely accused, even if it is because of a misunderstanding or misinterpretation. Even if the intentions of false allegations are not grounded in malicious intent and even if they are, that doesn’t leave those accusations without consequence.
When you add on the factor of not even listening or even asking the accused to verify or defend against the accusations formed against them. When you fail to investigate a situation and simply take the words of the child’s accusers, you are empowering the accusers over the accused without any justification to that decision.
I understand why the school staff didn’t investigate, in my case, I really do. I mean, why would a teacher bother when an entire class is accusing one child? Why listen when everyone is saying that person is guilty? It has been almost ten years since the incident; yet I still can’t wrap my mind around how anyone could justify humiliating a child like that.
How could any teacher possibly justify being willing to listen to one side of the story, but not listen to, or acknowledge the other child? What harm was there in getting the rest of the story from the accused? It would have helped the story make more sense; possibly even opened the teacher’s senses to what was really going on.
If the incident was as serious as they claimed it to be; how can a teacher fail to fulfill their duty by refusing to properly investigate such a serious accusation? The fact that the teacher didn’t even ask my side of the story destroyed my confidence in the teachers. Not because this was the first time, but because there were other incidents like this that had occurred during my time at school.
I looked up to my teacher’s, they were my mentors and that just made the reality of it so much harder for me. The very people I feared and respected let me down so many times and made me afraid to even come to them. I was afraid they would turn things around and accuse me and punish me instead because that’s exactly what they did.
Karyn's Blog 